I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize