Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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