We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Randomize
