'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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