you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
