Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
