it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
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