she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.