I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
babies were throwing up all over the place
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize
