Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
