The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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