Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
you win again, gameday.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Randomize
