i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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