put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
