Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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