god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Randomize