she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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