your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize