No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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