ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
