New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I AM VODKA MAN
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
dude. I can hear the air.
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