either way he was missing a nipple.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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