he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
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