Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
