why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
did you just send me my own nude
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
