We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize