fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
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Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
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TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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