I hate your face
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
