; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
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