i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
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