She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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