So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
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