I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize