Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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