Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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