Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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