i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
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He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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