I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
