If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
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