Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
