i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
the day after is always just damage control
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
