How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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