She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
the room spins SO much faster in panama
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
