WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
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he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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