Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize