You can't motorboat a personality
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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