she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
