used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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