he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
