so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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