Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Randomize
